Some Super-Cribbing Thoughts

Here's life back on the same track...
things are on a stand still and nothin's movin fast..
luv's gone along with my honey...
am left with just chinta and no money...
Russell Peters jokes don't make me laugh anymore...
As per Borat life's a big fuckin whore..
I keep running through an Apocalypto forest in my dreams...
Nothing's following me but I still scream....
Watched Departed n felt like blowing someone's brain...
300 showed it's much better if they are slain...
Chappell's boys shld be the one's to blame...
Another fuckin world cup has just gone down the drain...
Even Bangalore's gettin hot as it has no rain...
WTF may be I shld jst fix another drink and relax..
n let's switch the channel to some football match....



Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.

MY PAD.....HOME SWEET HOME....

Sitting Area

Place for my lazy BUM....



Mandy's DHABA corner.......

Sunset View from my Terrace.....isn't it beautiful.....muah..

My Favourite T...On my big beer belly :-)

A great compilation of one of my favourite songs....Enjoy

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zgh4WlH6YC0

Festival of Colors with my Nokia N73M.....my holi(y) exploits :-)

Since I bought a new phone with 3.2MP camera I had to flaunt it....hehehehe




At my DESK...dressed in official colors


Scene after the gr8 Mandy RAID

Another newly married dressed in colors of love


CLEAN BANGALORE GREEN BANGALORE

Another surpised culprit of my RAID

Beautiful end of the beautiful day

The Inheritance of Loss

Or should I say booker’s prize went for a toss????

I read this book from the start till the end and am still hunting for a story, there were so many characters but Kiran Desai seems to be struggling to gel all the characters together. Though the setup was nice and she could’ve produced a really marvelous book.

The only good thing about this book is how she has pictured the Northeast India and people living there, specially the one's who have settled down there marveled by its beauty. The US connection has no significance all together and I still believe that focus should have been more on the stories in India........ The ending was so sudden that it keeps you wondering whether you skipped a few pages....

What I wonder is since Salman Rushdie is backing Kiran Desai so much and I truly like his work I must have missed something about this book. I guess I would recommend 'God of small things', 'Kite Runner' , 'A Fine Balance' or 'Midnight Children' if you really want to know what award winning books are really like.....cause all this book lacks is Focus...and that too on the story :-(

My Rating: ***

She was Raped...but why???What drives men to Rape???...here's and excellent article by Rachel

http://www.merinews.com/catFull.jsp?articleID=124105&catID=2&category=India&rtFlg=rtFlg

Movies...Movies and more Movies......

I recently saw so many amazing movies that they definitely need a mention on my blog....

Babel

A truly international movie with a combination of serious humor, the filmmakers did an excellent job in weaving these four stories together; this movie did win its well deserved share of Golden Globes and is a movie to watch out for sweeping many Oscars.

Borat

This movie is nasty, contains really Gross-out humor so don’t watch it if you can get easily offended, now warning apart this movie is funny to the guts. Its plot revolves around a TV reporter named Borat from Kazakhstan, who sets out to discover American culture and falls in love with Pamela Anderson instead. There is also a hilarious nude fight sequence over Pamela that’s one of a kind, the movie is all about how different his country’s culture is where sleeping with your own sister is not considered a taboo…every cultural misunderstanding is a treat to watch......

Déjà vu

The first thing that pulled me towards this movie is its name as I experience Déjà vu’s all the time…this is a action sci-fi thriller where Denzel Washington plays a cop (again) and he has done really exceptional work in his gripping investigation of a bomb blast. A must watch…….

Rocky Balboa

Here’s our own Rocky Balboa coming out of retirement to compete with the present heavyweight champion Dixon. The movie is not that great if you compare with it’s previous parts, but for die hard Rocky fans like me it was a treat to watch….Love you Stallone……great ending to the great Rocky Epic….what a life!!!!

Dhoom 2

Aish Aish Aish Aish Aish Aish and Bips were treat to watch…rest of the movie was so so…..

Next in Line----GURU, DreamGirls, Crank, Fearless, WTC and lot more ;-)

Letter to my best friend.....

Dear Alcohol,

First & foremost, let me tell you that I'm a huge fan of yours. As my friend, you always seem to be there when needed. The perfect post-work cocktail, a beer at the game, and you're even around in the holidays, hidden inside chocolates as you warm us when we're stuck in the midst of endless family gatherings. However, lately I've been wondering about your intentions. While I want to believe that you have my best interests at heart, I feel that your influence has led to some unwise
consequences:

Phone calls: While I agree with you that communication is important,I question the suggestion that any conversation of substance or necessity takes place after 2 a.m. Why would you make me call those ex- boyfriends/girlfriends when I know for a fact they do not want to hear from me during the day, let alone all hours of the night?

Eating: Now, you know I love a good meal, but why do you suggest that eat a kebab, a butter chicken curry along with a sausage with cheese,onion and mustard (washed down with WINE & topped off with a Kit Katafter a few sweet chilli and sour cream red rock chips)? I'm an eclectic eater, but think you went too far this time.

Clumsiness: Unless you're subtly trying to tell me that I need to do more yoga to improve my balance, I see NO need to hammer the issue home by causing me to fall down. It's completely unnecessary, and the black & blue marks that appear on my body mysteriously the next day are beyond me. Similarly, it should never take me more than 45 seconds to get the front door key into the lock.

Furthermore: The hangovers have GOT to stop. This is getting ridiculous..I know a little penance for our previous evening's debauchery may be in order, but the 3pm hangover immobility is completely unacceptable. My entire day is shot. I ask that, if the proper precautions are taken (water,vitamin B, bread products,aspirin) prior to going to sleep/passing out face down on the kitchen floor with a bag of popcorn, the hangover should be minimal & in no way interfere with my daily activities.
Alcohol, I have enjoyed our friendship for some years now & would like to ensure that we remain on good terms. You've been the invoker of great stories, the provocation for much laughter, and the needed companion when I just don't know what to do with the extra money in my pockets.

In order to continue this friendship, I ask that you carefully review my grievances above & address them immediately. I will look for an answer no later than Friday 3pm (pre-happy hour) on your possible solutions & hopefully we can continue this fruitful partnership.

Thank you,
Your biggest fan


P.S.
THINGS THAT ARE DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Innovative
2. Preliminary
3. Proliferation
4. Cinnamon

THINGS THAT ARE VERY DIFFICULT TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Specificity
2. British Constitution
3. Passive-aggressive disorder

THINGS THAT ARE DOWNRIGHT IMPOSSIBLE TO SAY WHEN DRUNK:
1. Nope, no more beer for me.
2. Sorry, but you're not really my type.
3. Good evening, officer. Isn't it lovely out tonight?
4. Oh, I couldn't. No one wants to hear me sing.

MANDY DA DHABAAAA.........

It’s been a long time since I wrote last, blame is on my new job, shifting to a new apartment and my new hobby (cooking ;-). Well I have a rented a wonderful apartment in Indira Nagar and since the time I have moved in there’s a party every day. I had so many empty bottles collected in a month that I was able to pay off my maid’s monthly salary just by selling them.
Reason for so many parties…hmmmmmm….Well I need people to taste what I cook..lolz, and did they praise!!!! So ladies and gentlemen after 1 month of rigorous self training on cooking I can now make wonderful Chicken (Mughlai/Chinese), Mutton, Pork, Pranthas, Dal, Any kind of sabji, Rajma, Chole, Rotis (this was the toughest part), Pasta, Biriyaani….and above all my favourite dish Prawns in Red Curry (Thai). I have gained a kilo due to all the amazing foods I have been cooking and eating in the past month but I have no regrets as I have learned an art that I always thought immpoosible for a creature like me. Cooking for me has become a meditation of some sorts, I am more content and happier in life because of this exercise. A man can do anything if he puts his heart into it…….Yummy….

Everyone is invited to drop@myplace in Bangalore to savior the taste of my cooking.

Check this link out.....

http://www.star28.net/snow.html

Endurance and Pain

Everyman thinks why the hell women crib about giving birth and enduring the pain, it's worth it right? And then how much pain can it actually be? as his belief that he has endured more pain in those bike accidents and college brawls...I mean broken bones are more painful right?......but then the time comes when his perception is changed and he gets a root canal done just to realizes the true meaning of pain. Believe me this must be what giving birth must feel like ,I can say this after getting couple of root canals done and this recent surgery that I had to go through because of an infection right below my root canalled tooth. My dentist was adamant on pulling my tooth out and leave me toothless for life( unless I spend fuckin 25000 rupees for an implant), somehow I convinced him to find me an Oral Surgeon to cut through the bone below my tooth to take out the infection and fill it with some bone supplement. Easier said then done as next day I had a man with a green mask with a drilling machine inside my mouth along with my dentist poking a suction pipe to suck out all my juices. To keep my mouth open for 2 hours while they were experimenting with this unique case felt like extended labor pain while trying to give birth to an unwanted child. Since I had earlier underwent root canal treatment I was expecting a lot of pain and was calm on the surface, what scared me most was once the surgery was done those doctors were clicking picture inside my mouth as if they have solved a case of there life, it felt like they have taken out a huge chunk of cancer while performing a miraculous life saving surgery. They even delayed stitching up my wounds so that they can catch a better frame using there camera phones, at last when I protested (really had a tough time doing that as my left lip was hanging down due to all that anesthesia and it was impossible to sound like me) they realized I need to close my mouth and gave me 9 stitches inside my mouth. I felt like an old torned down shirt which was getting mended. At last they triumphed with a job well done as I saw a man with a swollen face and hung down left lip in the mirror, a face that looked even more swollen the next morning. Today after a full week the face seems to be my old self and tomorrow my stitches are going to come off though I'll have to exercise precaution for a month I feel I feel like I've been born once again, though it was tough at last I got rid of my illegitimate child :-)

Children of Heaven (Bacheha-Ye aseman)

Usually I don't write movie reviews but this movie touched my heart, it is a really sweet story of two Iranian brother and sister (Ali and Zohra) who live in poverty with there parents. The story starts when Ali accidentally loses Zohra's shoes and the kids are afraid to tell there parents, they come up with a plan to share Ali's shoes (Zohra wears them in morning and Ali in the Afternoon according to there school timings) till the time they figure something out. There only hope in the end is a marathon race for which the 3rd prize is a pair of sneakers and Ali plans to take part in it but comes first after a tough try of coming third. I bet this movie will wet your eyes as this has to be the sweetest adventure story ever written.

My Date with the Flute Maestro

As they say you just can't forget your first times...be it your first kiss, your first girl friend, your first car or the day you get your first job, all these moments are unforgettable. Most of youngsters in India hate to hear classical music and term it as boring because that's what it is as I too remember those dreadful days when some stupid politician used to die and I had to miss my favorite TV shows as DD used to play classical music whole day (I guess it still happens on DD), so it has become a symbol of mourning for me. It's a fact that you just can't like something if you are forced to watch it and the blame goes to our poor old Doordarshan for giving classical music a boring tag.
But then times change and came my first live classical music concert (well it wasn't really a concert only Bansuri), though I am used to hearing instrumental music (without any knowledge of the Ragas) this experience was mind blowing. Pandit Hari Prasad Chaurasia has a great aura surrounding him and the thrill I experienced when he played the famous Rag Malhar cannot be explained in words. Pandit Ji started the concert with Rag Bhairavi and ended with Shivranjani Raga in which he did some amazing percussion with a smaller flute. The best part about Panjit Ji's concert besides music is the raw pleasure and perfection the great man puts in his performance. He has made me a fan of classical music (only instrumentals) and the next man I would like to hear live is Ustad Zakir Hussain as Tabla happens to be my favorite.

Can you answer this?

Question : You are in a boat in the middle of a river. You have 2 Cigarettes and have to light any one cigarette. You don't have anything else with you in the boat? How will you do it?

One long night @ the call center


What can I say about this book, it does brings back all those memories of my stint at the call center industry and good old Gurgaon, only city I have lived in where you can party all night long after Kathmandu, I have some of the best memories of my life in that city. Anyways the author has done well in creating a nice story though he faltered a bit towards the end but then I had huge expectations after reading the amazing 5 point someone so it was a bit of turn off there. He was able to keep the charisma of his one liner in this book as well and created a story out of a loser type hero again. I never thought so many things are possible in one night, at the least the author should have given a thought to the timeline. To sum up this entire entire book is just a one time read and since the price was reasonable I have no regrets :-)

I, PROUD TO BE AN INDIAN

Here is an article I found that would open our eyes and put our heads down in shame.........

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I am proud of being an Indian. I am one among you, a mascot of an Urban man. I respect women in my house. During Rakhsha bandhan my sister ties me Rakhee and i give her nice gifts. I love her a lot. My mom is like god for me. I am man like all of you. When i went to college, I didnt attend classes but i used to stand near the college gate along with my friend and tease all the girls. I used to tell them how beautiful they are, how nice their cheek and back is etc etc. While traveling in the bus, I get close to girls and brush my body against theirs, it fun, the girl can’t say anything so I take advantage of that. I have touched them at so many places just for fun. When in friend I discuss about girls in the society, in college and about their assets. I share my experience of how i kissed my Girl friend, how good her assets are and how i made love to her. I feel proud when i share this with my friend who considers me macho and look at me with awe and respect. I sometimes lie that i have loved this girl just to get added respect from my friend. I tell them sometimes the whole sequence and how good the girl was in bed. I travel in train and hang out of the door. I shout at the girl standing on the platform just for fun. I call them Ran.. Pros.... chik..I am one among you who says this, I cant say alone since its dangerous. Generally when you people are with me, i am excited and also no one will take panga with us. I have followed girls in dark and hit them behind and driven past them. I don’t care what she must be feeling but i enjoy it. I usually haunt for such situation. And if that is not enough i take my car and me and some of our friend kidnap girl from the road side, we take turns to rape her in the moving car and then we dump her. We don’t care if people have seen us or not not they won’t do anything. Usually the girl doesn't say anything or complain to police. If she goes to cops they don’t even consider registering the complaint, since they want to do the same with the girl as we did. But some idiots are there who register the complaints. So what we have money and we are not even caught. Sometime if we are caught, we bribe them who make the case quite loose so that we escape during the trial. Even if the case is strong and the case goes against us, I will offer the victim to get married to me and the judge will take a sympathetic view to me without considering the torture and brutality meted out to win. So i win again. No one can prosecute me. You can count the number of cases in which conviction is passed against the number of cases that is registered against. My fried who’s a cop one day was drunk a lot and he saw a young teenage couple. He just got aroused and threatened the boy away and raped the girl in police chowkie. His name is Sunil More. He’s happy in jail, thode din problem hua but he’s okay now. Waiting to get released due to lack of evidence so that he can go back to his wife and kids who will give him a hero’s welcome.
I don’t spare girls in movie theaters, at public places anywhere. I don’t spare any moment to harass a girl whether she’s with her relatives, friend or alone. If you object to my moves, you will be threatened not only by me but also by people close to you, your friends, your relatives etc. Look at what friends Morpani and krishnani. They mixed some drugs in a girls drink in Bawa international hotel. She is a South African model and trying to get some role in movies. They took her along to kalyan, the waiters and people out there know about it but they didn’t say anything. Then they took her and raped for two days. So what krisnanis dad was dying in hospital while he was raping the girl? They even recorded that on the mobile and am sure they will release it soon. Arey this hype about the case is because the girl is foreigner. Otherwise they are so influential that the case wouldn’t have registered. They do this all the time and people know about it but just yeh baar thoda panga ho gaya. You can ask the waiters at Bawa or Rajmahal. They know it all. You know most of my friends now have camera enabled mobile phone and they can secretly record their girl friend when making love. They release it on the internet so that we can enjoy it. We all enjoy it don’t we? It doesn’t make any difference as how it will effect the girls who trust us so much. Sometimes we fix up spy cam to record and release other couples in their private moment. We all enjoy it later and our appetite for this is increasing ever. You can get it at any mobile dealer in the sim for some money, especially borivli in Mumbai or palika in delhi.
I am proud to be an Indian, Mai apne bare mey kya likhu, U can read about me in the news paper everyday. I strike every second in one form or the other.

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FIVE POINT SOMEONE (Chetan Bhagat)

What can I say about this book, it not only made me smile but it made me laugh and that too more than once...some of the incidents are really hilarious and even though the author has selected IIT where only the most intelligent cream of Indians study he has found a bunch of average guys with GPA's of 5 point something and constructed a story that could've existed in any college. A really enjoyable read....

Some punjabi shayari for bevada's like me.....

daaru kehande ne shaan punjabiyan di,

kai mehfilan ehde bina adhooriyan ne,

kai peende ne esnu shaunk vaaste,

sade varge diyan taan eh majbooriyan ne.........
majboorian vich peende haan.....

kadi dard vich peende haan......

je kar khushi vi naa hove koi......

taan ehdaan hi pee lande haan.....

Talli as usual

Mandy

Life of Pi (The Lion, the hyena and the lifeboat)

I finished it at last; this book is such a short read but took me a really long time to find it interesting. Initial pages are really boring when our good old Pi Patel is in Pondicherry, the fun starts when his ship sinks and he is left on a lifeboat along with a Bengal Tiger, a hyena, an orangutan and a dying zebra. The author has struck the right chord of comedy and logic in his struggle of survival which includes surviving with a tiger onboard through hundreds of days of cast away.
All in all a worthwhile book to read in case you are a national geographic fan or wants to learn the survival techniques in case you find yourself ship wrecked some day or just to have a good laugh. Don’t know why it got the Man Bookers Prize though.